it bothers me that Kansas and Arkansas are not pronounced the same
I’m from the UK and I have been pronouncing Arkansas as Ar-Kansas my whole life
For all my non-american friends, Arkansas is pronounced ark-an-saw
in 1881 the state legislature made it official to call is ark-an-saw after two state officials had a dispute over how to pronounce it.
There’s a dog at work today who is a real life deviantart oc. He’s a border collie with long blonde 90s surfer dude bangs and it’s the most amazing thing I’ve seen since I started this job.
Nature is a wonder.
I was being 100% serious.
please. stop praying for my grandpa!!!! you are making him too strong. he broke out of the hospital and the cops cant get him. he’s too powerful
# still the best moment in a tv show ever
“The most common concern was my health. Presumably I, as a fat woman, would not know how to properly operate the complicated piece of equipment known as a bikini. What if I strangled in all the straps and ties? What if I became distracted by the complexity of spandex, a substance heretofore unknown to me, and wandered blindly into traffic? What if I ate it? I’m not sure what all these well-meaning people thought was going to happen to me. Blood pressure, heart problems, joint problems and cholesterol were all brought up, but I didn’t see any kind of warning label anywhere on the suit that suggested the Surgeon General had investigated these claims. I remain skeptical as to the health problems bikinis cause.”
god bless Jenny Trout
the article can be read here
I love Jenny Trout. Jenny Trout I hope you see this… You cool.
I saw it. You cool, as well.
This is my favourite bookstore and bookseller in the world. Bar none.
I used to get to Seattle every six months or so, and whenever I visited I always made it a priority to stop in BLMF and ask its keeper what he’d been reading lately. He possessed an inexhaustible memory, a comfortable lack of snobbery, and impeccable taste. The first book he recommended to me, upon listening gravely to my litany of at-the-moment authors (Barbara Kingsolver, James Clavell, Maeve Binchy, Neil Gaiman, Charles DeLint, Anthony Bourdain) was Tipping the Velvet. He also later landed me with Geek Love, Anno Dracula, half the Aubreyad, and more modern Literature-with-a-capital-L than I could carry home.
The next-to-last time I dropped in, I asked if he had any P. G. Wodehouse.
"I have zero Wodehouse," he said, "and here’s why…"
Turned out that some fiend had taken to creeping in every month or so expressly to inquire of any Wodehouse and, once led to the volumes, to buy it all. ALL. Didn’t matter the condition, the edition, or whether he had another just like it in his possession; the villain bought every single P. G. Wodehouse in stock, every single time.
Was he a fan more comprehensive, more truly fanatical than any other I’d heard of, let alone known? Was he virulently anti-Wodehouse, only purchasing the books to keep their wry poison from infecting the impressionable masses? The world may never know.
I didn’t get any Wodehouse then, and I didn’t really feel the lack. I found plenty of other treasures that trip. But here’s one reason why BLMF and its proprietor are my favourite of their kind: that was two years ago, you see. Maybe three. In all that interim, I never planted foot in that bookshop. Never called. Never wrote. And I’m one face out of hundreds of thousands, dear reader; one reader he saw twice a year for three years, then not again for another three.
But I walked in the shop last Friday. Nodded hello.
"Can I help you find anything?" he asked, lifting his head from the phone.
"No, I’m good," I said.
"Wait—hold on a second." He set the phone down, walked ‘round the towers of books balanced precariously on the desk, on the floor, and atop other, only slightly less precarious towers. He jerked his head conspiratorially toward the far end of the shop, led me carefully to a shelf way in the back, removed a tattered stack of mass market paperbacks and motioned me closer to see what they’d been hiding.
Fifteen pristine Wodehouses: crisp, heavy, and—
“Hardcover,” he said, and waggled his eyebrows.
Reader, I bought them all.
Linguistics and Harry Potter are two of my favourite things.
I didn’t know which blog to put this on. So it’s going on both :]
honestly one of my favourite things.
Reports are still coming in but here are the facts we’ve verified at FIJMU:
- Welcome to Nightvale has cancelled.
- The game room only has one video game system and one television.
- The two are not connected.
- Under 500 people showed up.
- The hotel does not have wi-fi.
- People playing in the ball pit have complained of itching.
- The $17,000 raised at the last minute has been spent on cocaine.
- Nash Grier is filling in for Welcome to Nightvale.
- Former supporters are protesting and picketing the entrance.
- Two cosplayers have died of boredom, several other hospitalized.
- Nash Grier has been shot.
- Two more Nash Griers have grown back in his place, and they’re terrorizing the game room.
- People who played in the ball pit have reported growing new appendages.
- There are now four Nash Griers. Participants have been asked to stop shooting them but more and more keep coming.
- George Lucas has cancelled.
- Water quality is low, more itching is reported.
- Germany has defeated Brazil 7-1.
- Those complaining of itching are now quarantined.
- The quarantine zone does not have wi-fi.
- Reports of theft are at a record high for the USA since the Great Thieving of 1807.
- The MRA table has been burned to the ground, there are smouldering fedoras everywhere.
- The band “The Smouldering Fedoras” has cancelled.
- Welcome to Nightvale has been caught in bad weather exiting the convention.
- The “Dash” in DashCon has been stolen.
- There are now over 128 Nash Griers stampeding in the game room.
- The itching has become a burning. Heat upon Heat. But the Gom Jabbar is at our necks we cannot withdraw!
- Jessica Alba has cancelled.
- The ball pit was apparently filled with the eggs of the giant tse-tse fly.
- A horde of Griers is now fighting the hatched giant flies.
- Yet the convention is still boring as watching paint dry.
- The drying paint has cancelled.
- The convention has been declared the best in tumblr history.
More news as it comes. And now the weather.
- Welcome to Nightvale is now suing FIJMU.
- The Nashes Grier have been gassed, as have the flies.
- As have 78 attendees. Police are investigating.
- The screening of the film of The Fault In Our Stars has been cancelled.
- The convention will now screen “Caligula.”
- Kids will be allowed in free.
- 9 severed heads found.
- 9 headless bodies found.
- Heads do not match bodies.
- Welcome to Nightvale has died in traffic due to weather.
- The undead have risen to torment the living in the merch room.
- There was no merch room. The undead are unaccounted for.
- Refugees of the MRA table are now fighting with the Feminism panel.
- Advertising has been called rampant, with DashCon selling out to marketers in a vain attempt to sell shit to the attendees.
- Buy my novel, Valhalla!
- The convention organizers have been arrested.
- Repeat! The convention organizers have been arrested!
- The police have cancelled.
- The CSI Panel has filled in.
- The Brony room has caught on fire.
- A mosh pit has formed in the music room, 13 dead.
- John Green has cancelled.
- The remaining TFIOS panel has joined the feminism panel in fighting the MRA. Fighting is said to be brutal.
- All MRAs are reported dead. Repeat, all MRA men reported dead.
- MRA death Update: Not all men.
- Welcome to Nightvale is now rotting in the game room.
- The screening of Caligula has been interrupted by sectarian violence.
- Obama to send 300 peacekeepers to the Caligula screening.
- UPDATE: 300 peacekeepers found dead.
- Free lollipops are being offered to upset attendants.
Further updates as we receive them at FIJMU. Your prime source for Dashcon news.
- The Fabergé Egg collection has gone missing.
- Victims of the ball pit have been herded into camps.
- An outbreak of Ebola is sweeping the convention.
- Measles has cancelled.
- The Angry Video Game Nerd has stated he will still attend!
- The Sushi Bar is contaminated.
- Clarification “The Sushi Bar” is a band.
- The Angry Video Game Nerd is taking the stage and is expected to calm the convention.
- The Angry Video Game Nerd has been shot.
- The Brony room has been extinguished, but blame for the fire is being hurtled in every direction. There is great discord.
- The Angry Video Game Nerd has died. Festival promoters are offering to handle his funeral.
- The Angry Video Game Nerd’s funeral will have a game room and ball pit.
- People who went in the ball pit at the Angry Video Game Nerd’s funeral are reporting itching.
- The BDSM panel has been denied entry to Caligula.
- Festival owners are attempting to turn them away with the use of whips and chains.
- It’s not very effective.
- Dashcon has been named “The worst event in the history of existence” by Fox News.
- Dashcon has been named “The worst event in the history of existence” by a reputable news source.
- DotCon has been cancelled in advance.
- The Angry Video Game Nerd has risen after three minutes to bring salvation to the Con like some sort of Tumblr Christ.
- The risen Angry Video Game Nerd has been shot again and is now permanently dead.
- The lollipops given to upset attendees were contaminated by the Sushi Bar.
- Walter Cronkite has said the convention is unwinnable.
This whole thing is golden, but I’d like to point out that this might be my favorite use of “not all men” ever.
That is the hardest I have laughed in at least a week oh my god